When I’m sitting in the car, looking out the sky train window, walking down the street, and waiting in line for lunch, my thoughts run wild. My heart’s thumping against my ribcage, my stomach turns, and I feel like gagging. I’m in my head a lot. Writing it down helps me move on to the next thing.

 

I cap the time I spend writing each blog post at 10 minutes, letting my brain run wild until the alarm sounds, then turning my attention to a game, speaking with a friend, or doing a hobby.

 

These posts are a window into my brain, but also a window to let out the steam building inside my head. The mental health entries I’ve read on NAMI’s website, my campus newspaper, and online have played a big role in fighting my depression. I want to document this experience vividly, so those who haven’t experienced mental illness can be more understanding about it and those who are struggling can hopefully feel a little less alone. I hope that I will feel better one day and be able to look back at this blog to remember to stay down-to-earth, to be understanding of others’ unique struggles, and to celebrate how far I have come.

 

I can’t speak for others’ experiences with depression, but this blog is me trying to piece together my own.